Like the inevitable character in a third of Hallmark Channel Christmas movies, I fear I have lost “The Christmas Spirit.” In hopes of finding it, I will be watching a ridiculous number of Christmas movies on TV. Here is my story…
Catch a Christmas Star (2013) Hallmark Channel
-An absolutely atrocious opening song. I honestly winced when the vocals came on.
-OHMYGOD, it is Shannon Elizabeth singing, the star of this movie, who is playing a pop star. Jesus.
-The WORST lip syncing I have ever seen.
-Two houses that are so overly decorated for autumn/Thanksgiving, I can barely tell if they’re houses or the inside of a Hobby Lobby.
-The most unconvincing set of grandparents to ever grace a Hallmark family film.
-And the fakest looking green screening of Shannon Elizabeth in front of a football stadium… where she is trying to sing the Star Spangled Banner. This is when I decided this would be completely unwatchable, btw.
-Kids running away to meet the world’s worst pop star.
-A plethora of adults who have no concern whatsoever for a 7- & 10-year-old out on their own.
-The most stereotypical caricature of a gay best friend
-A lot of Shannon Elizabeth obviously mistaking her lines.
-Her complaining about the paparazzi, and then going out in public (in front of a hospital, I believe) to kiss this guy?
-A dude wearing 4 hoop earrings.
-“Where did they get my yearbook photos?!” Um, I don’t know. Maybe from one of the hundreds of people who went to your school?
Honestly, whomever decided to let her sing in this should have been fired immediately. I made it 5 minutes before I started fast forwarding.