Like the inevitable character in a third of Hallmark Channel Christmas movies, I fear I have lost “The Christmas Spirit.” In hopes of finding it, I will be watching a ridiculous number of Christmas movies on TV. Here is my story…
‘Tis the Season for Love (2015) Hallmark Channel
-Two actresses who have no energy or commitment to their roles RIGHT OUT OF THE MOTHER FUCKING GATE.
-…And they’re supposed to be actresses. Y’all can’t even act like you’re in THIS movie, you CERTAINLY can’t act like you’re stage performers.
-I’m 90 seconds in, and if they mention David Mamet one more time, I swear to god…
-A scene where she is supposed to be talking to her limo driver, except he doesn’t actually talk. They couldn’t pay this guy for one fucking line?! This isn’t a Bob Newhart bit.
-A mother who is WAY too excited for her 30-something daughter to go see Santa. Actually, a mother who is WAY too everything.
-A lot of adults who can’t get over their high school extra-curricular accolades. Great, great, great.
-14 minutes in, and they mentioned Mamet 3 more times. I’m officially out.
-“News travels like tumbleweeds.” That is absolutely not a saying, and even if it were, it would make no sense whatsoever.
I did fast forward through the next hour & 45 minutes, stopping sporadically to get the gist. They said Mamet two more times in just those moments alone. Unacceptable.